My Story - The Meeting

Sigh. I cannot believe it. Since my last entry, I have not done anything special or meaningful. I feel this feeling of deja vu, as if I'm back in those loserish Secondary 2 years. I don't dare to do anything. Again. I'm as gutless as before.

I guess it is because, you have crushed any bit of confidence I have left. What have I done wrong? Is there anything wrong with having feelings for you? Why do you have to be so cold? I did not even tell you that I liked you. I guess you just inferred. You just took things into your own hands, to be safer than sorry, to just crush me. I guess you were right. I still did like you.

I remember, we met twice recently. First was in the morning, before school. I was walking past the lockers when I detected someone standing there. I felt this urge to look, but i did not. I walked up the stairs. As I walked up the second flight, I glanced left. It was you. I then continued on. I swore if this was a melodramatic scene in a movie, a tear would have dropped down as I turned to look forward. It was that sad. Somehow I just did not have the courage, and just ignored you like I have never known you. Are we fated to be only, friends?

Somehow, the second meeting was after school. I had to pass the school to get home. As I was nearing the school, deep inside I hoped that you would appear, because I knew that you had something on in the afternoon. But, the nearer I walked towards school, the lesser the hopes of seeing you. But, just as I was to reach the school gate, you came out, with a group of friends. Me? Just a sheepish smile and then walking past you. Was that the end? Us walking in different directions? I hope not.

I would like to end this entry, by dedicating this song, Yu Jian by Stefanie Sun to you.

Sun Yan Zi - Yu Jian



Hearing the end of winter
Spring comes, fancy turns into love

I suddenly woke up
I woke up the day I realised I fell for you

I thought, waited, hoped, but it was not to be
Things seldom turned out the way I hoped

Dark skies, evening time, outside the car window, was someone waiting
I am waiting for you, no matter how dreary the conditions

Looking in all directions, wonder how many twists and turns love must go through before coming to me
I am so confused right now

Who do I meet, what will happen
Are you really the One? Will I meet someone who is really the One?

The one whom I am waiting for, how far is she in the future?
How long am I going to have to wait for the One?

I hear the wind coming from people and trains, I get a queue number for Love
How many are there in my situation? I am not the only one who is waiting

I look at the sky, and then travel through time
Sometimes I wish I could fast-forward to the future

We too get hurt in love often
Maybe love is not for me? Am I too sensitive?

Looking at the road, the entrance I dreamt of is a little small
It might become a tough experience

But, meeting you is the most fabulous accident
No matter what may happen, I do not regret loving you, and still feel that meeting you was for the best

One day, my mystery will be solved
I will find the ever elusive One

posted by Jason Chua at 11/24/2003 11:24:00 PM |